Vala: Don't worry. I'm not gonna hurt you. Daniel: Thank God. Vala: Much. I hope. Vala: I liked you better tied up. Vala: Ow. Ow, you hit me! Daniel: You hit me. Vala: Yeah. You know, we could just have sex instead. Vala (to Mitchell): I know we haven't met. That, I'm sure I would remember. Vala: I know nothing about your fair planet, other than it seems to have a rather interesting if somewhat limited gene pool. Mitchell: Ladies first. Vala (to Daniel): Well then, after you. Vala (to Teal'c): Give it a try, Muscles. I'll give you half. Vala: I haven't been this disappointed since I had sex with Daniel. Vala: We could be partners. We can split everything down the middle, 60/40. Vala: You two aren't gonna let people from two different worlds beat you at your own silly game are you? Vala: It's funny, isn't it? Daniel always wanted to get into my pants, and now I'm in his. General Landry: You can't cram for a psychiatric evaluation. Vala: That's what they want you to think. Vala: Question two: "You are in the desert. You see a tortoise lying on his back in the hot sun. You recognize his plight but do nothing to help. Why?" Hmm. Why? (while writing) Because... you... are... also... a tortoise. Vala: The key is to be as inconspicuous and non-threatening as possible. If you like I could take Daniel. Sam: It's the wrong one! You can't just jam it in! (Vala jams in the small crystal. The power grid activates.) Sam: How did you do that? Vala: Honestly? I don't know. That almost never normally works. Sam: I am very glad to be back. The whole thing was kind of creepy. Vala: Hey, what was I like in that reality? Sam: You were in jail. Vala: Not again! Vala: There's a 70 percent chance that if we dial manually we'll be able to establish a connection and a 50 percent chance that the bomb will just go off. Mitchell: That's 120 percent. Vala: Well, there's some crossover where we establish a wormhole *and* it blows up. Mitchell: (on radio) did you catch any of that? Daniel: (on radio) Yeah, 100 percent chance we should have brought someone that knows what they're doing. Vala: Well, then you should say what you mean. Daniel: I don't think you want me to start doing that. Vala: I don't think you want to start thinking what I think. Vala: Being stuck on this ship is worse than being stuck at SGC. I tell you last time I was this bored I took prisoners. Daniel: I was there. Vala: I'm gonna go crazy. And I'm taking you with me. Vala: My own mother used to say to me "Vala, happiness is not something you can buy." Or in my case, steal.